What was going on when I was born?

The Soviet Union is coercing the Polish people with ''an invasion by osmosis,'' Secretary of Defense Caspar W. Weinberger said today as he continued a running commentary on Moscow's threat to Poland. By osmosis, Mr. Weinberger said, he meant ''a gradual filtering in'' of forces and supplies that would be an addition to the two Soviet divisions that have long been in Poland. He said that the level of activity, which has included numerous aircraft flights from the Soviet Union to Poland, seemed to be the same as yesterday. Mr. Weinberger arrived in Bonn this afternoon after touring British and United States air bases in Britain. He is here to attend a meeting of defense ministers of the North Atlantic alliance that is scheduled to open tomorrow.

The five major industrial consortiums that stand poised to begin mining strategic minerals from the world's oceans see President Reagan's recent decision to review the draft treaty on the Law of the Sea, rather than immediately ratifying it, as a major victory for their interests. But the mining groups conceded that the decision, which opens the door to renegotiation of provisions of the treaty, could mean that no accord would be reached. Negotiations on a Law of the Sea pact began in 1973. Without a treaty, industry officials said, it was unlikely that any company would go ahead with seabed mining because of the prohibitive costs and the potential for conflicting claims to the minerals. Despite those risks, most industry leaders said that they welcomed a chance to make some substantive changes in the draft proposal to protect their investments. Mining company officials estimate the capital investment and technological development costs of each mining operation at more than $1 billion. The companies are seeking to harvest rich nodules of manganese, cobalt and nickel, strategic minerals that are found on land in only a few areas.

Secretary of State Alexander M. Haig Jr. assailed Syria today for ''the brutality'' of its attacks on the Lebanese Christian stronghold of Zahle and said that Syria's actions were unaccertable ''by any measure of appropriate international standards.'' After several days of behind-the-scenes efforts to produce a lasting cease-fire in Lebanon, Mr. Haig and his top aides are now expressing apprehension that a full-scale civil war, perhaps involving outside forces from Israel, might engulf Lebanon. A senior aide to Secretary Haig told reporters here, soon after Mr. Haig arrived from Israel, that ''we are right on the brink of a major outbreak of hostilities in and around Beirut.'' Final Meeting Held With Begin This morning in Jerusalem, after his final meeting with Prime Minister Menachem Begin, Mr. Haig said that he had virtually no disagreements with Mr. Begin on the need to prevent further indiscriminate shelling of Christian areas in Lebanon, particularly around the city of Zahle, about 30 miles east of Beirut.

The Reagan Administration today proposed easing or eliminating 35 air quality or safety regulations as part of a program to help the domestic auto industry, now fighting to preserve its competitive position against Japanese imports. ''The industry must solve its own problems, but the Government must not unnecessarily hamper its efforts through excessive regulation and interference,'' the White House said in a statement issued under President Reagan's name as the Cabinet-level auto task force recommended domestic actions to assist the auto industry. The task force had considered both tax and import relief as well but took no specific actions in these areas because of disagreements. The announcement was immediately hailed by the auto industry.

1, as the space shuttle's maiden flight is officially called, is to get the Columbia into orbit and back to a safe landing on Earth. If the astronauts John W. Young and Capt. Robert L. Crippen manage to accomplish more than that, possibly the completion of 36 scheduled orbits, space agency officials will consider it a bonus. The hope is that when the Columbia rises from its launching pad here Friday morning, as plans now stand, it will stay up for an orbital voyage lasting 54 1/2 hours. But nothing is certain. If trouble develops before the launching, the astronauts might have to leave their cockpit before their craft even gets off the ground, sliding like trapeze artists down an escape wire to a parked military personnel carrier. With a lot of luck, they would then drive to safety.

House Democrats today proposed a $713.5 billion budget for the fiscal year 1982 and recommended more funds than the Administration sought for social programs and what would seem to be more money for military needs as well, although the Democrats said it was actually less than the Administration has proposed. The Democrats also said that their budget total was $4.3 billion less than proposed by President Reagan in March. They based that statement on their calculation that President Reagan's $695 billion budget used an incorrect projection for inflation and that, when the Reagan budget is adjusted for higher inflation, the total is really $717.8 billion. The Democrats also endorsed a smaller tax cut than the one proposed by the President and urged that the Administration's proposed deficit, which the Administration calculates at $45 billion but which the Democrats estimate at $50.5 billion, be cut to $24.6 billion. They also projected a balanced budget by the fiscal year 1983, a year earlier than the Administration projected.

Last year it was disco roller-skating and riding mechanical bulls; this year it seems to be running for Governor of New Jersey. The Garden State is offering up to $600,000 in public funds to help finance the campaign of anyone who wants to run in the June 2 gubernatorial primary election, and a record number of candidates are taking advantage of the offer. By the close of business yesterday, 24 had filed with the State Election Law Enforcement Commission, and the filing deadline is still more than two weeks away. As one election official put it, ''The question in Trenton has become, 'Who isn't running?' '' Paul Kovolisky, manager of the International House of Pancakes in Parsippany, declared last week that he would not run for Governor. Also not running, according to a informal sampling, are Chris Jakubowski, a secretary at Bayonne Welding and Boiler Repairing; Frank Dell Aglio, owner of a Sunoco gas station in North Bergen; Laura Rouba, owner-operator of the Curley Cue beauty salon just outside Trenton, and Maria Granado, an employee of the Hoboken Bilingual Keypunch School.

Gustav Husak, the leader of the Czechoslovak Communist Party, warned today that the Soviet bloc would not watch passively while the Communist system in Poland was undermined. With Leonid I. Brezhnev, the Soviet leader, sitting behind him and lending his words further weight, Mr. Husak compared the situation in Poland to those that arose in East Germany in 1953, in Hungary in 1956 and in Czechoslovakia in 1968, when Soviet troops suppressed dissidents. Mr. Brezhnev, who flew to Prague yesterday, was greeted with prolonged applause as he entered the hall for the opening session of the 16th Czechoslovak Communist Party Congress. It remained unclear why he had made the trip.

A bitter dispute has erupted between three major Western oil companies and the Kuwaiti Government over terms of their crude-oil contracts, authoritative Western sources here reported today. As a result Kuwait's daily crude production since March 31 has dropped about 400,000 barrels, to 900,000 barrels from 1.3 million barrels. The sources, who asked not to be named, said that if existing contracts were not renewed and the oil companies stopped producing crude oil in the tiny Persian Gulf state, a total of more than 500,000 barrels of crude oil could be lost to the world market. Kuwait's annual income from crude exports is more than $25 billion, and at least half that accumulates in surpluses.

The Supreme Court ruled today that a worker retained the right to sue his employer for violations of the minimum wage law even after arbitration had resolved the dispute in management's favor. The 7-to-2 decision, written by Associate Justice William J. Brennan Jr., was a victory for organized labor. The Court reversed a ruling of the United States Court of Appeals for the Eighth Circuit, which ruled that, by submitting their wage grievance to arbitration, a group of truck drivers were barred from subsequently suing their employer in the Federal courts. Not Paid for Inspection The truck drivers were not paid for the time they were required to spend inspecting their trucks, and argued that they were entitled to compensation under the minimum wage provisions of the Fair Labor Standards Act. After a union-management grievance committee, set up under the contract, rejected their complaint, the drivers tried unsuccessfully to bring a lawsuit.

The Administration proposed easing or eliminating 35 auto regulations governing air quality or safety in an effort to help the U.S. auto industry compete with Japanese imports. A Cabinet-level auto task force had considered tax and import relief as well but took no specific actions because of disagreements. The industry immediately hailed the regulatory changes. (Page A1.) House Democrats proposed a $713.5 billion budget for fiscal year 1982, $4 billion less than President Reagan had requested. They also endorsed a smaller tax cut than proposed by the President, urged that the Administration's proposed $50.5 billion deficit be slashed to $24.6 billion and projected a balanced budget by fiscal 1983. (A1.)

International The Soviet bloc will not sit by and allow the Communist system in Poland to be undermined, the Czechoslovak party leader, Gustav Husak, said in Prague. He likened the present situation in Poland to those in East Germany in 1953, in Hungary in 1956 and in Czechoslovakia in 1968, when Soviet troops suppressed dissidents. Leonid I. Brezhnev, the Soviet leader, sat behind him, giving his warning further authority. (Page A1, Column 6.) Poland's leading hard-liner was chosen to head the country's delegation to the Czechoslovak Communist Party Congress in Prague. The chief delegate, Stefan Olszowski, has long been a protege of the Kremlin. (A10:1-2.)