What was going on when I was born?

Governor Cuomo, who called this week for a state constitutional amendment on equal rights for women, did so even though leaders of the women's movement had urged him not to. The leaders, from the National Organization for Women and the National Women's Political Caucus, told Mr. Cuomo through his aides that while they did not oppose the concept of a state amendment, their strategy was to focus all their resources on the fight for a Federal amendment. Efforts to pass a Federal amendment have become stalled in the last few years, and his proposal, they said, could be counterproductive. ''The policy was to press for a Federal E.R.A. and not get diverted into state E.R.A.'s,'' Barbara T. Rochman, president of the New York City chapter of NOW, said today. ''It's a matter of what strategically was best.''

For United States auto makers, 1983 was a year when rebates ended and sharp cost cutting combined with solid sales to produce a financial turnaround that analysts said was little short of spectacular. The industry reported today that it continued its rebound last year from the worst sales slump since World War II, selling 6,786,977 cars for the year, an increase of 17.9 percent over the 5,756,658 sold in 1982. Including import sales of 2,368,764, a total of 9,155,741 cars were sold in the United States in 1983, making it the best sales year since 1979, when 10.5 million were sold. Sales in 1982 totaled 7,955,970.

An innovative program of medical care for the poor that the Reagan Administration hoped would serve as a model for the nation has been dogged by large excess costs and charges of corruption and mismanagement. The cost of administering the program, which seeks to cut the price of health care by stimulating competition among doctors and hospitals, is over four times what was predicted, according to Arizona legislators who opposed the proposal. The Federal Bureau of Investigation and the Arizona Attorney General's office are investigating accusations of graft and possible involvement of organized crime. Some doctors and patients are complaining that the program is crippled by bureaucratic inefficiency.

Investors who loaded up on high- technology mutual funds when the market boom started 18 months ago made a killing in the first half of 1983. But those who failed to bail out by summer very likely suffered heavy losses that often wiped out their earlier gains. The funds that did well in the last half of the year were heavy in international stocks or more traditional businesses like tobacco and insurance. Those are the conclusions of the first full analysis of how mutual funds performed last year, released earlier this week by Lipper Analytical Services. The numbers show that despite the overall strength of the market last year, most investors who profited in mutual funds did so by radically redirecting their portfolios by the beginning of the third quarter.

FRIDAY, JANUARY 6, 1984 The Economy The S.E.C. charged that Paul Thayer illegally helped eight people to make $1.9 million in the stock market by giving them ''insider'' information in 1981 and 1982, before he became Deputy Secretary of Defense. Mr. Thayer said the complaint was based on ''a distorted view of selected facts.'' The eight people included a Dallas stockbroker who is a longtime acquaintance and a woman with whom Mr. Thayer had a ''personal relationship,'' the commission said. (Page A1.) Top Administration officials were unaware until two weeks ago of the questions concerning Mr. Thayer's conduct that led to the filing of a complaint, according to a White House aide. (D3.) The S.E.C. suit describes a pattern of illegal trading by a group of people with social and professional ties. (D3.)

Several South Street Seaport fast- food merchants said yesterday that business was so bad they were unable to pay their rent and feared they might have to close. The tenants, with shops on the second floor of the project's main building, Fulton Market, said they were doing less than half the business projected for them by the project's sponsor at the time they signed expensive leases last year. The sponsor is the Rouse Company, of Columbia, Md. During late weekday afternoons and evenings, they said, their floor is as deserted as the Seaport streets were packed when the $351 million project opened last summer in lower Manhattan near the East River.

Benjamin Ward was sworn in yesterday as New York's 34th Police Commissioner at a City Hall ceremony attended by 350 well-wishers, including Representative John Conyers Jr., one of the department's severest critics. During the 30-minute ceremony, which was filled with warmth and touches of humor, Mayor Koch said his appointee, the first black to head the department, had the ideal qualifications for the post. But after the ceremony, the mood changed, when former Commissioner Robert J. McGuire expressed displeasure with Mr. Conyers's presence. Mr. Conyers, who attended at the invitation of Mr. Ward, was seated in a section reserved for prominent guests and took no part in the ceremony. The Democrat of Michigan was chairman of the recent hearings by a Congressional subcommittee into allegations of police brutality against black and Hispanic New Yorkers.

-distance care of elderly relatives incorrectly quoted Dr. Robert N. Butler, Brookdale Professor of Geriatrics and Adult Development at the Mount Sinai School of Medicine in New York, on the increase in life expectancy since the turn of the century. It is 26 years.

ON stages all over town actresses are sharing the taste of success. More than a dozen of them are currently making a vivid impression on New York audiences. Of these women, who can all be seen in performances this weekend, some are new to New York; others are new to the theater. A few are familiar faces trying to make a dracommon, these actresses are appearing in starring or featured roles in musicals and comedies, and on stage a number of them, at least covertly, are making statements about the pressures and possibilities of women today. Each of the actresses would seem to have chosen the right role at the right time, a move that demands a synchronization of opportunity, availability, intuition and luck. How can anyone be sure how good a role is or what chance a play has of success? A wrong choice can lead precipitously to the unemployment line and to a bad case of hindsight, as the performer wonders why she rejected musical X in favor of comedy Y. Somewhere in New York there is an extremely talented actress who was asked to audition for roles in ''Noises Off'' and ''Isn't It Romantic'' and for her own reasons, decided not to. Both plays are hits, and the actress is searching for other roles.

William Howard Taft 4th, the Pentagon's counsel, was nominated to succeed Mr. Thayer. Page A13. WASHINGTON, Jan. 5 - The Securities and Exchange Commission charged today that Paul Thayer, before becoming Deputy Secretary of Defense, helped eight people make $1.9 million in stock-trading profits by illegally giving them ''insider'' information. Among the eight, who were also charged, was a Dallas stockbroker who is a longtime acquaintance and a woman with whom Mr. Thayer had a ''private, personal relationship,'' according to the S.E.C. suit. Mr. Thayer resigned his position on Wednesday, effective Jan. 12, to fight the charges, which he called ''entirely without merit'' today.

Above all else, Brooklyn and Queens want more police. The Bronx would rather have the city take care of parks. Manhattan is most concerned about its old people. And Staten Island wants better sewers. This is what 46 of New York City's 59 community boards had to say when asked recently by the Koch administration to rank the city services they thought most important to their residents.

The stock market had one of its most spectacular days ever as record trading volume yesterday propelled the Dow Jones industrial average to within five points of its record close. Fueled by heavy buying from insurance companies, banks and other institutional investors, volume on the New York Stock Exchange swelled to nearly 160 million shares, from 113 million the day before. The widely followed Dow industrials, which opened with an impressive gain, advanced strongly until midafternoon, when profit taking began to erode some of the earlier gains. At the close, the average was up 13.19 points, to 1,282.24, after being ahead 16.23 points at 2 P.M. Trading volume also surged abroad, sending stock indexes in Tokyo, Frankfurt, Zurich and London to record levels.