What was going on when I was born?

Five years after sweeping changes in New York State's laws governing property and alimony settlements in divorce cases, major bar associations and women's groups generally agree that the goals of the laws are not being met and that revisions are needed. ''When we passed that bill in 1980, virtually everybody was for it including the big shot bar associations,'' Assemblyman Jerrold Nadler said. The Manhattan Democrat said he voted for the bill with misgivings, fearing ''the bias of most judges - not necessarily male judges - would result in women getting the short end of the stick, and that's exactly what happened.'' Even some of the architects of what is popularly called the equitable distribution law say the law is not always being fairly applied. Lester Wallman, a New York matrimonial lawyer who sat on an eight-member committee that was formed from the major bar associations to draft the law, calls it ''the biggest bomb.''

Here's the way it was in major league baseball yesterday: * Tom Seaver won his 300th game. * Rod Carew made his 3,000th hit.

South Africa's principal black mine workers' union called today for a strike over pay to begin this month at gold, diamond and coal mines. In a separate warning, the union threatened to boycott white businesses unless the Government rescinded its emergency decree within 72 hours. The union also said it would call an immediate national mine strike if President P. W. Botha carried out threats to repatriate foreign black workers in reprisal for international sanctions against South Africa. Sanctions have been imposed or threatened by several nations in response to the emergency decree.

With a remarkable sense of timing and a slightly sprained ankle, Dwight Gooden pitched the Mets to a 4-1 victory over the Chicago Cubs today, won his 11th straight game and broke the club record set 16 years ago by Tom Seaver. The 20-year-old pitching wizard from Tampa, Fla., stopped the Cubs on a five-hitter with three walks and six strikeouts, and won his 17th game of the season against only three defeats. He also pitched the Mets to within half a game of the first-place St. Louis Cardinals in the tightening race in the National League East. Since he was outpitched by Fernando Valenzuela of the Los Angeles Dodgers on May 25, Gooden has started 14 games, won 11 and gone to no decision three times. No pitcher in the 23-year history of the Mets has ever won more games in a row. And by winning 11 straight, he surpassed Seaver's streak of 10 victories in 11 starts between Aug. 9 and Sept. 27, 1969, when Seaver was a 24-year-old star pitching the Mets toward their first pennant.

International South Africa's black mine union called for a strike over pay this month and, in a separate warning, threatened to boycott white businesses unless the Government rescinded its emergency decree within 72 hours. The union, which claims 230,000 members at gold, diamond and coal mines, also said it would call an immediate national mine strike if President P. W. Botha carried out threats to repatriate foreign black workers in reprisal for international sanctions against South Africa. [Page A1, Column 6.] Uganda's political factions were urged to unify so that elections can be held in a year. The call came from the leader of the military coup that toppled the civilian Government of President Milton Obote last month. Insisting that the new regime was in complete control, the military leader, Brig. Bazilio Olar Okello, said in an interview that if ''we can agree on unity, we shall manage security in Uganda. [A3:4.]

Every moment belonged to Tom Seaver. He had come back to New York in search of his 300th career victory, and by late yesterday afternoon it was his, a smooth and efficient performance that indelibly etched his name among baseball's finest pitchers. When he first arrived here 18 years ago, he was a Met prodigy. Yesterday, the 40-year-old Seaver, now an employee of the Chicago White Sox, beat the Yankees, 4-1, and became the 17th pitcher to reach the coveted milestone. He did it with some exceptional pitching, walking one, striking out seven and finally retiring Don Baylor on a high fly ball to medium-left field with two men on base and two out in the ninth. Then a crowd of 54,032 in Yankee Stadium erupted in unison and offered a prolonged ovation.

THE day began with a bat in Tom Seaver's bedroom. Not a Louisville Slugger, but an airborne mammal who had found his way through a window into the Seaver family's house in Greenwich, Conn. It was about 5:30 yesterday morning when Seaver and his wife, Nancy, were awakened. They jumped out of bed and flung their arms, grabbed a broom and gave other appropriate signals to the intruder that he was not wanted, especially at this hour, and especially on this day.

Machine tools, trucking, construction, lodging, retail stores. An enterprise with all of those businesses under the same roof could be an old-fashioned conglomerate. Actually, the owner is Kohlberg, Kravis, Roberts & Company, a Wall Street investment firm that specializes in leveraged buyouts, the popular takeover strategy that results in a heavy debt load for the acquired company. Kohlberg and several other concerns have completed so many buyouts in the past few years that they have quietly built up stables of diverse companies, just as the conglomerate builders did in the 1960's.

Plans are under way for the rebirth of Steeplechase Park at Coney Island, with its razzmatazz of roller coasters, Ferris wheels, carnival music, chute-the-chute and heart-stopping, free-falling parachute jump. The opening of a $55 million amusement park on the former site of Steeplechase Park, which closed in 1966, is being planned for next July 4 in connection with the Statue of Liberty centennial. Horace Bullard, the founder of Kansas Fried Chicken, a chain of 15 restaurants in the metropolitan area and 7 in Japan, has signed a 20-year license agreement with the city to build and operate the new park. Mr. Bullard, who is 47 years old and grew up in East Harlem, has assembled 17 acres, part of it private land and part city land, between West 15th and West 19th Streets and Surf Avenue and Riegelmann Boardwalk.

The board of directors of Beatrice Companies removed James L. Dutt, chairman and chief executive officer of the food and consumer products company, in an unexpected action Saturday. Beatrice said that William W. Granger Jr., 66 years old, the company's former vice chairman, would assume the posts of chairman and chief executive officer and that Mr. Dutt would remain as a consultant to the company. In its statement, Beatrice said that Mr. Dutt also ''plans to engage in venture capital transactions.'' Mr. Dutt could not be reached for comment today. A company spokesman said he, along with 600 Beatrice employees, was attending an automobile race at Elkhart Lake, Wis., where a Beatrice-sponsored car was entered.

The nation's industrial economy continued to sag for the sixth consecutive month in July, with production at its lowest level in 32 months, the National Association of Purchasing Management said in its latest report released today. The monthly survey of purchasing managers at 250 industrial companies showed overall activity was flat compared with June, rising only one-tenth of a percentage point and remaining stuck below the levels the association considers expansionary. The reading on new orders was also basically unchanged, while employment was up only slightly. ''The problems in the economy continue,'' said Robert J. Bretz, director of purchasing for Pitney Bowes Inc. and chairman of the association's business survey committee. ''Every key indicator except employment confirms an underlying weakness.''

''Some guys out there are cutting throats by running a bad truck.