April 28, 1983

When Mayor Koch killed the proposed New York City theater ticket tax, it came as no great surprise to Peter A. Piscitelli. ''We lobbied it good,'' Mr. Piscitelli said yesterday, the day after the Mayor offered a municipal budget without the tax. His old friends in city government, he said, had not told him in advance in so many words that the tax he was working against was out. ''But they'd smile when you talked with them,'' Mr. Piscitelli said, ''and they'd say, 'Hey, you might have a winner.' '' He had no trouble reading signs like that. He knows the game and he knows the players.

The International Trade Commission recommended today that President Reagan place quotas on specialty steel imports for three years to protect American manufacturers. The unanimous decision by the three commissioners puts pressure on the President to help the domestic industry, which makes such products as stainless steel and other special alloys. But he is not bound by law to do what the commission recommends.

APROLIFERATION of electronic gadgetry - including advanced stereo systems, television sets that rise on command and computerized lighting - made its presence felt in both traditional and contemporary rooms at the Decorator Show House of the Kips Bay Boys' Club, which opened to the public yesterday. But, as in many marriages of convenience, the relationship between decorating and technology is often uneasy. In some cases the two are learning to live together nicely; in others the honeymoon may already be over. One thing, however, seems certain: Elaborate and costly electronic hardware is here to stay, and many of the 19 designers in this year's event are trying to make the best of it. ''I think that this is the area in which things are happening,'' said Harvey Herman, who designed a plush, pale-hued living room in the 1903 Stanford White mansion on Fifth Avenue at 79th Street. The room is focused on a bleached-oak cabinet housing a brass-finished wireless-remote-control stereo system by Audio Design Associates.

The principal owner of a small laser company that could benefit from President Reagan's program to develop a futuristic missile defense system has given or offered company stock now valued at millions of dollars to leading scientific and military experts and others with connections to the Reagan Administration, according to public records and company officials. The recipients of the stock include Edward Teller, the physicist and a member of the White House Science Council, who helped persuade Mr. Reagan to adopt the plan, and Robert Keith Gray, a public relations executive with close ties to the Reagan family. William E. Simon, a former Secretary of the Treasury and an outside adviser to the President, has been offered stock at a bargain price. Former high military leaders, who are not associated with the President, are also connected with this small company, Helionetics. One is Adm. Thomas B. Hayward, who retired last summer as Chief of Naval Operations.

Because of an editing error, a listing of the members of the National Commission on Exellence in Education yesterday incorrectly identified the chairman, David Pierpont Gardner. He is president-elect of the University of California system.